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Treat everything on this site with an enormous pinch of salt. This site does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my college, my friends, or my teddy bear; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on anything; all rights reserved; this site is distribution copyrighted to the extent that you may distribute neither its content nor any of its associated parts at all, and you may not make a profit from it or include the content in commercial publications without written permission from my legal representatives, who are nasty pieces of work, I can tell you. The value of this site, and any income from it, may go down as well as up. Other copyright laws for specific sites apply wherever noted; this site is subject to change without notice; website is larger than it appears in mirror; any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is probably entirely intentional and almost certainly not coincidental; hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; your mileage may vary; no substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; this offer is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; website is provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities; not liable for damages due to user misuse; an equal opportunity employer; no shoes, no shirt, no website; quantities are limited while supplies last; website content may appear to be minimized due to settling; if defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized service centre. Caveat emptor; read at your own risk; parental advisory - explicit lyrics; text may contain material some readers may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; keep away from sunlight, pets, and small children; limit one-per-family please; no money down; no purchase necessary; you need not be present to win; some assembly required; batteries are not included; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; safety goggles may be required during use; sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is broken; call before you dig; for external use only; if a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place; keep away from open flames and avoid inhaling fumes; avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit; do not place near flammable or magnetic source; smoking this website may be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of this website; text used in this page is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals were used to test the html code; no salt, MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult a humorologist; website is ribbed for your pleasure; slippery when wet; you must be 18 to enter; possible penalties for early withdrawal; correspondance offer valid only at participating E-mail sites; allow four to six weeks for delivery; disclaimer does not cover hurricane, lightning, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, and other Acts of Gods, misuse, neglect, unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation, broken antenna or cosmetic damage, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustments that are not covered in the appendix, and incidents owing to aircraft crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, GLOF bursts, broken glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fires, flying projectiles, or dropping the item; other restrictions may apply; one dimensional approximations may have been made; correlations are regressed from air/water data at zero or 5 bar(g); plastic pants may be required during takeoff; contains no genetically modified ingredients;

mud on road.


This page last updated: 9/9/99